Not a victim of stalking? Are you kidding me?

Crazy as it seems, there have been a small group of people that keep insisting that our daughter Morgan Ingram was not even a victim of stalking.  I guess it doesn’t matter to them what the truth is.  They don’t seem deterred by the fact that she was murdered during an ACTIVE investigation into her stalking only 2 days after her felony stalking detective warned us that he believed her stalking was about to escalate and he would be assigning additional patrols to our home.

The forensic pathologist, Dr. Kurtzman, who did our daughter Morgan’s autopsy, has had his credentials as a doctor questioned by nearly every expert that has reviewed both of his Postmortem Report’s. He concluded on the first report that Morgan died of natural causes, and then after threats that he would change it to suicide if I, Toni Ingram (Morgan’s mom) didn’t back off from questioning him, he did in fact change it to suicide.

That same pathologist, Kurtzman, also wrote, in both reports, that Morgan was the victim of stalking (because she was – she was murdered during an ACTIVE felony stalking investigation), yet there are still a small group of people out on the Internet (and they know who they are, and what their agenda is) claiming that there was never a stalking.  This is the worst form of victim bashing there is.  Why?  Because these sick people are protecting the criminals. They have had a consistent, relentless agenda for the last 5 years as they continually bash the victim…using deceitful tactics, giving out misinformation, changing the facts, and outright lying.  They are always acting like they have pure, unmotivated reasons for their actions, which is absolutely untrue…the bottom line is that they are lying and victim-blaming / victim-bashing – and this is pure evil! Lies help criminals get aways with their crimes – it allows murderers to still live among us.

“Viciousness is part of the world we live in, some of us choose to ignore it with the rationalisation of wanting only positivity to flow our way. How selfish we have become! That the pain of others has become a hindrance to the fulfilment of our positive selves.” – Aysha Taryam

Murderer’s Denial of the Victim…and Victim-blaming

I have read, Criminals sometimes neutralize wrongdoings by maintaining that the crime victim “had it coming.” This is an example of the technique of neutralization.

In the past year I have heard from a person involved in Morgan’s murder…shocking I know, but not entirely unexpected.  

This female has been in trouble her whole life, and has always blamed others for her wrongdoing – so why stop now.  Does anyone think that a person involved in a criminal activities, like stalking and murder, will just admit what they did, and joyfully go to jail?  I really don’t ever hear of that happening, but I do read many articles about people that starting killing at a young age and were not caught until there were many other victims.  This female has used one line over and over when asked if she killed Morgan, “Show me the proof.”  Ask most criminalists and they will tell you that an answer like that, to a direct question of culpability, is a major red flag…

In the message I received from this female, she said Morgan was an evil psychopath, she had it coming, her death was an accident (they deny the injury), and she is happy because Morgan deserved to die (they deny the responsibility).  She accused Morgan of destroying people’s lives and making them kill themselves (they deny the victim).  

This is so “text book.”  This female is delusional.  She is giving herself, and others, a justification for Morgan’s death.  None of what she said to me was true, so it really didn’t upset me, but it was a “glimpse” into the mind of Morgan’s murderer.  Pretty scary stuff, and don’t think for a minute that this person has changed…no, she will only get bolder and harm more people in my opinion.

Syke & Matza (1957) and Matza (1964) wrote their conclusions on the process of delinquent youths becoming criminals as a matter of neutralizing their personal values and attitudes as they drift from conventional behavior and illegitimate behavior.

They deny responsibility, they deny the injury, they deny the victim.

They condemn the condemners.  The say, “It was not my fault,” “No harm was done,” They had it coming.”  In their minds they really believe they can shift the blame and their guilt of the crime in order to lesson the value of the life they destroyed.  Sound familiar?  Well it sure does to me.

This is a very basic article that explains the techniques of neutralization…i.e. Victim-blaming.  Excuses made by the person responsible for the crime in order to shift the blame from them to their victim. 


How to describe #Homicide


According to Cornell University Law School, “Homicide is when one human being causes the death of another”.  Cornell University adds that while murder is one type of homicide, but not all forms of homicide are murder.

Homicide includes murder, manslaughter and accidental, justifiable or excusable homicides.  Morgan’s death was without doubt at the hands of other human beings so it should be considered a homicide.  Now I believe Morgan’s murderer has contacted me, as well as contacting another person, to try to say Morgan deserved to die, so in their warped perception of life they feel that justifies her death… I really don’t believe that is what the law meant when it says, “justifiable homicide” – nope, just because the demented mind of a sick murdering individual that says their victim deserved to die does not make the murder justifiable.

It is so macabre, sick  and twisted to experience how far victim blaming and bashing will go. I see it continually in not only Morgan’s case but also in the many others who reach out to me with their own stories. I am continually receiving messages from people I do not know… from all over the world.  These messages have a similar theme – they want me to continue fighting for justice for Morgan and to never give up.  Just this morning I received more messages:

Comment: I just wanted to say I am so sorry that justice has not been served in this case for you and your beloved daughter Morgan. You must miss her everyday and to have to fight for justice is just awful. Stay strong xxx
Comment: Dear Mr. and Mrs. Ingram First of all.. I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine the pain and sorrow that fills your heart on a daily basis. I am so so very sorry. I believe that the fight for justice will be rewarded and I thank you for the examples you set in the battle for Morgan’s justice. That we as parents must not give in to the authorities but keep on fighting for our children. Afterall, we know our children and therefore also know when something is wrong! I would gladly offer you all my help and support but sitting in Denmark there’s very little I can do. The time is 23:35 pm here I DK and I just watch your tv-appearings on the ID Channel. I do believe that when the time is right justice will be served. You are in my prayers. May you all be blessed.

All these wonderful souls, from all over the world, keep us strong.  We will always continue our fight to have Morgan’s case investigated and her legacy on earth restored with arrests made and justice attained.  Our entire family is committed to stay the course no matter how long it takes.

Be assured we are here for the long run and for Morgan, there is NO statute of limitations on murder.  Once the entire story of serial gang stalking and violence is torn from the places it is kept tightly stashed away among the other skeletons in the closet of Garfield County Colorado, Morgan will at least have her justice!

And then the word #stalker came into play – another story that needs to be shared

stopvictimblamingPlease read the story below – I really shouldn’t say it is a story because what it truly is is another human being’s current reality due their stalker.  It is horrifying, it has affected her children, it has completely changed her life, and it is so very wrong. The judicial system needs to understand how serious stalking is. Changes need to be made – criminals should not have more rights then their victims!

This is an email I received this morning:

My case with a stalker is going to jury trial very soon.  Due to this, I’m doing my research on Victim Blaming as I’m sure the defense will use this heinous tactic, and that is how I found your site.  My story began 6 months ago while breaking it off with a short-lived relationship.  Although, due to an alcohol problem with this man, I did get  a simple domestic violence restraining order, which of course I thought would be all I would need.  That day would prove to hold so very much more.  I now carry 3 criminal protective orders, he has been incarcerated for 2 months on a no bail warrant.  All I wanted was peace, but his insistence that God told him not to stop pursuing me, several texts and voice mails, him showing up at my house refusing to leave, and my visions of waking up with him standing over me, the “If I can’t have you….” attitude, and finally after several times of calling law enforcement and 2 arrests of violation, the word “stalker” came into play.  He found my new phone #, found me on social media, and followed family members.  One message reads: “If I can’t find you, I’ll have 20 people looking for you”.  As of today (10.13.2015), a new judge said he would grant another bail hearing next Tuesday.  Of course when you’ve gone into hiding twice, and you are looking for yet another safe place, this decision fills you with fear.  The word “Stalker” is used lightly, as it was with me before this time.  But my world has now become a reality of always looking over my shoulder, protecting my loved ones and myself from whatever the “next step”, the “next move” could be.  In all of our minds no one wants to believe these things truly happen, and of course we would rather blame the victim with “if only they had done something different”.  I know I will face that kind of mentality soon as part of the defense, and I dread the day I re-live it all in a twisted story by a defense attorney.  It is my hope my story will one day inspire others to do what they must to protect their family, and never minimize what a person is capable of.  Stalking is a very real crime and like Morgan, your first prison is when it all starts.  My business was shut down, my life has had to start over, and the paralyzing effects of fear are more than one can bear.  Leaving your home alone, being alone, and even falling asleep become burdens you try to avoid.  My heart goes out to all victims of any crime, and if any have had to experience victim blaming, I’m positive it made a negative emotional impact in an already devastating circumstance.  Thank you for allowing me to e-mail this to you, it was only today in what was supposed to be a Felony Settlement Conference (another one) that the decision to revisit bail was put on calendar.  The plethora of charges against continue to mount with not only the felonies, but 8 misdemeanor charges as well.   Please keep me in prayer, and tell others to always be very careful.  If there is one red flag, there are many, many more.  Be safe as you possibly can always.  This is my new reality.

Then she wrote:

Truly one of the hardest things to deal with is the “unknown”  Never knowing the next move, the next step. You can try to block it but it sits in wait in your head. I am not looking forward to taking the stand. I’m doing my homework on Victim Blaming which is a natural response in most people’s minds. People want to believe others would not instill fear, and there had to be a reason, thus blame the victim. In my case he believed in his head, we were going to be together no matter what. It got to a point my 14 yr old son slept with a kitchen knife next to him, my daughter moved in with me.  Two months ago I moved and have basically been in hiding even with him incarcerated. Of course he proclaims innocence but doesn’t realize imprisoning someone emotionally, constant emotional manipulation, is wrong. No one knows if he will attack, take hostage, to get what he wants or not. That is the worst part. And now the judicial system may consider bail after two months of no bail. I want what is fair and just for all of course. It seems as though me having to give up my life, rebuild, start over and continue to wonder when and if he will be out again, does not come into play.  This story needs to be told for anyone who remotely believes it can never happen.
Please post my story, and please feel free to use this as well.  Maybe with more awareness people will realize “stalking” is not only physical, you become emotional prey for the predator. They stalk your mind in order to get their way, and you must do all you can do to protect yourself because, despite what others believe, you do not know what the next step will be, and it must be stopped before it is taken.  Be strong as possible. Be wise. Never minimize.  And do your homework, research, be prepared if it comes to a courtroom.
I hope after reading this you will have a more intimate understanding about the emotional devastation that stalking creates.  Her story should be shared as often as you can in order to help raise awareness about the seriousness of stalking.  Thanking you ahead of time for sharing!

Part 3 – Misconceptions? NO – Just Misdirection & Lies…

How could the sheriff’s never see the stalker?

Morgan’s stalking started with a clear pattern, the stalker would come, terrorize, and then leave, all unseen. We were never fast enough out the door to catch more than a glimpse, because he was outside hunting Morgan and then watching our response – provoking, then observing and measuring – predatory stalkers do this, it’s well documented. It was almost the same pattern almost every time and it became maddening, exhausting, and extremely upsetting for us all. There was no warning for Morgan that it was coming, then it would just happen.

The Sheriff’s also had a very similar pattern…Deputy responding to stalking incident

The typical Garfield County Sheriff response to a call about the stalker tapping or banging on her windows again.

This night it was a call to the sheriffs about how relentless the stalker was and the call was  made almost an hour earlier, before this was caught on video camera. The deputy parked out front and sat in his truck for a few minutes, very common, then he came over to shine the flashlight under Morgan’s window. They all knew exactly which window because they had been there and seen it so many times before. This time he did not circle the house, he just walked to the corner and then came back to her window. He seemed to see something on the ground and kicked at it with his foot, but he never knelt down the the ground for a closer look, he did not take any pictures, and while Colorado law is very clear that the sheriff’s must:

respond as soon as reasonably possible to a report of stalking and to cooperate with the alleged victim in investigating the report.  Colo. Rev. Stat. § 18-3-602(7)

The deputy, or anyone else for that matter, never followed up with Morgan to get all the details, and they never did anything else to investigate her stalking, this was not just common it was every single time. The deputy then went out to sit in his truck for a few minutes before leaving. There was no report by the sheriffs of what actually happened, and obviously absolutely no, “cooperation with the victim in investigating the report.” Well over  a year after Morgan’s murder when we finally saw the sheriff’s reports for the first time, there was a reference to this incident that called it a, “trespass,” and that was it.  It is no wonder that Morgan at times believed the sheriff’s were doing nothing to catch or stop her stalker. Morgan was killed two nights after this incident.

Now… does anyone really think there was any chance this deputy is going to see the stalker? The stalker comes, terrorizes, then he observes from the darkness before leaving.  Steve always swore he could feel him out there in the darkness. Then, much later, long after the stalking incident was over, one or sometimes two deputies came, shined a light, talked, maybe walked around the house, then left. It was not even close to two ships passing in the night, it was two ships in opposite directions avoiding each other. This pattern of response had zero chance of ever seeing, much less catching the stalker. There needs to be education and training in order to help future victims of stalking.

If you are being stalked, you must know this – Most violent crime begins with some form of staking. If there is no investigation, they will never catch, or otherwise confront, the stalker, and until the stalker is confronted there is little chance the stalker will be stopped.

What is wrong with this picture?Lamoine filming death sceneThe man in the middle is a detective on the morning Morgan’s death scene was being investigated. He is taking video of the exterior of the house. He’s the one front and center, standing 50 feet away, the two men behind him are deputies. To the left are Morgan’s bedroom windows, the same windows that the deputy was looking under with his flashlight 2 days earlier.

The problem is where he stands right now is the closest he will come to Morgan’s windows. I will say it again, THAT IS AS CLOSE AS THE INVESTIGATOR WILL GET TO THIS ENTIRE SIDE OF THE HOUSE WHEN TAKING VIDEO ON THE DAY HER BODY WAS DISCOVERED! Even the deputies who responded to a stalking incident would walk right up to the windows and wave their flashlights at the ground. It’s how they saw footprints in the dirt, scuff marks, they touched her windows and wondered aloud how the stalker would make the banging noise that startled Morgan every time. In front of that is right where Detective Glassmire knelt to the ground 4 days earlier and tossed rocks he picked up from the ground and threw them against that window, saying, “there is your stalker!” Right before he told me Morgan’s stalking was expected to escalate.

But four days later, after she was discovered dead, the investigator at her death scene was satisfied to take one quick flash of video from all the way back where he stands.  Possible murder investigation or just going through the motions instead of investigating? Incompetence, or cover-up, call it whatever you want, but it was not an investigation. The back doors where we believe the stalker entered were not filmed either, nor were they fingerprinted, and the drapes were never touched from the inside, yet the sheriff’s can claim to be certain there was no sign of forced entry, when in reality that is just another false statement.

The night of Morgan’s murder everything went wrong…it was the perfect storm.

▪ It was one of the only two nights that week that Morgan wasn’t able to get a friend to sleep over on the couch.  Our bedroom was on the back of the house, and her room was on the front – very far apart. She was scared to sleep alone and could no longer handle sleeping on the floor of my closet for protection as she did for the first month of her stalking. She was very much looking forward to being gone babysitting for the families of military veterans over the weekend.

▪ The sheriffs had increased their patrols and since their large trucks would set off our front door motion detector alarm and wake us up, Steve turned it off that night after Morgan returned home at 9:03 pm so we could all get some sleep. All 3 of us were way beyond exhausted.

▪ We always left our dog loose in the house to watch over things while we slept, except on the nights when Morgan had friends sleep over.  That night we put her up in our bathroom, because earlier in the evening she had positioned herself by the front door to watch out the window, and we thought she would keep us and Morgan awake all night.

▪ We made all these mistakes -plus so many more that night.  We had no idea what was about to happen.  When you have a stalker you think that you have gone through all the motions before you go to sleep at night, but you never remember all of them, and as soon as there is a crack to squeeze through stalkers always manage to find that crack… it makes me physically ill to think about all the mistakes we made, especially since that very night my “intuition” was screaming at me, I was so worried, and yet I did not listen to myself.  So now I always remind everyone to LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION!

▪ The night before Morgan was murdered she asked her father to buy her a knife, which he did.  She had it in bed with her when we found her body.  This is how scared she really was.

And really:

  • Morgan did not take the car without permission…this is such a ridiculous statement, and the sheriffs knew they misstated (or lied) about that. Morgan had an old Rover, which she loved, but it also had over 250,000 miles on it and Steve did not trust for Morgan to be driving it while she was being stalked – we were frightened it would break down on the road and leave her vulnerable. So Morgan and I shared my car, she drove it 75% of the time and I drove it ~ 25% of the time. She never needed “permission” to drive it, we just coordinated or drove together.  The last day before she was murdered she told me she would be gone between 2 – 4 pm approximately, at which time she would return so we could run errands together, one of our favorite mom/daughter things that we did.  At around 4:15 or so I texted her cell phone to see where she was.  I was worried (because she had a STALKER and I couldn’t reach her, not because the car was gone!)  Any parent would have been just as concerned as I was.  Steve came home and sent her a text message around 6 pm and she answered him.  She apologized by text for missing my earlier calls and the sheriff’s saw those texts. So why would they even say that Morgan took the car without permission? It’s incorrect and they know it. So basically she was out of pocket for 2 hours, I was worried, she did speak with us and apologized, she told us she was safe, and where she was, we told her that we would let her know when we get home so she could come home, that was our stalking protocol…she did not want to come home to an empty house because she was SCARED of her stalker.  I hope that clears that up.
  • Morgan was not out partying with friends that night – she got home at 9:03 pm and did not leave again.12.1 Morgan home copyThis is a picture of Morgan arriving home after trying to sleep at a friend’s Aunt’s house on their couch, and when that didn’t work out she went to ask another friend if he would sleep over our house, but that didn’t pan out either so she came home alone.  She wasn’t trying to stay away from home because of her parents – that is one of the stupidest thing so far that I have heard…she had a predatory stalker and she was afraid to sleep alone and she had every reason to be afraid. The Colorado statutes spell out the terror of stalking, and Morgan was living it. Everyone failed her, and the sheriff’s would rather blame the victim then man up and admit they made a mistake. How brave they are.  If people can’t understand why a victim of stalking would be afraid then I suggest they read the Colorado Legislative Decree on stalking, they understood it and they summed it up well. Morgan had every reason to be afraid that night, the stalker’s pattern had changed again – and then she was murdered.
  • The backpack that was reported found in the car with alcohol in it was not Morgan’s and the alcohol was not hers. WE have the video of her ex-byfriend putting it in the front of the car. His driver’s license was in it, that’s how the sheriffs were able to investigate and know who’s backpack it was and give it back to him. SO – why would they associate the backpack with Morgan? It was my car and his backpack, they figured it out and returned it to him. Just another “blame the victim” rather than man-up??? Again, how very brave of them or was there another reason to try to mislead people with their reports?
  • The pipe found in her room was not hers, but it did belong to her friend, the friend that had just slept over the night before her murder, and it was also given back to him.  These are all provable FACTS. And just in case there is still a question, just as I, or any of Morgan’s friends would have expected, Morgan had no alcohol or illegal drugs on her toxicology reports. False reporting is not investigating, so why all the false reporting?  More lies in order to muddy the waters and keep people from knowing the truth – she was a victim of stalking and she was murdered by her stalker(s).  Remember justice delayed is justice denied.