Remembering Morgan in the kitchen… ♥︎

Throughout this blog I have tried to show others that never had the opportunity to meet Morgan just who Morgan was, how she chose to live her life, how she made a difference in the lives of others, and how her bright light is still shining to this day.  I don’t think I could ever explain Morgan with just words…but I have tried.  Morgan wasn’t just a victim of stalking…she wasn’t just a victim of foul play, her life meant so much more than how it ended.  Morgan was a real person, she lived life to it’s fullest, and lifted everyone up with her smile.  Morgan had hopes and dreams, she loved life.  So now I have decided to start to show everyone another part of Morgan – the Morgan that loved different types of food, and loved to share them with others.

Morgan enjoyed making special treats, and desserts for her family in friends.  Everyone was so happy to receive these wonderful gifts from the kitchen.  She would even go on Martha Stewart’s website and follow the directions to learn how to make special little gift boxes to enclose her home made food gifts – that was Morgan for you :)

In the last two years of Morgan’s life she also began to learn how to make some of her favorite entrees.  While flipping through some of the recipe books in my bakers rack the other day I came across some of the recipes she had marked in the book.  I started to cry, like I usually do when I miss her, but then I remembered how excited she was to go shopping for all the ingredients, and then cook the recipe for Steve and I, and then I started to smile.  At that very moment I decided I would share with all of you another passion of Morgan’s…cooking.

Morgan always chose organic, and locally grown over anything else, even for her puppies’ food she bought Crystal River Ranch free range beef to incorporate into her own home made dog food  She always loved home made food over store bought food, and after doing some research she had also decided her puppy should eat healthy too.  I will try to find the recipe she used to cook for her puppy, but in the meantime I will start to share the recipes she used to cook for her grateful family.

Here is the first recipe I would like to share with you and in the future I will keep sharing as I come across all the different recipes that she used to make.

Shaping-Gluten-Free-Gnocchi-1Gnocchi with basil sauce.

♥︎ Ingredients to make the gnocchi

1 pound freshly boiled potatoes

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

1 egg, beaten

sea salt & ground black pepper

ground nutmeg


♥︎ Ingredients to make the pesto sauce

1 ounces of fresh basil leaves

1/4 cup of pine nuts

2 cloves of garlic

sea salt & ground black pepper

4 tablespoons of olive oil

the juice of 1/2 lemon

1/3 cup of grated parmesan cheese

☞ Preparation time is about 25 minutes and cooking time is 15 minutes.  This recipe serves 4.

Serve with 2 tablespoons of butter and some grated parmesan cheese…enjoy!

First make the pesto: chop the basil and pine nuts roughly and put into a mortar with the garlic, salt and pepper.  Pound together until reduced to a think paste.  Transfer to a bow, add the oil, a little bit at a time, stirring constantly until thick.  Stir in the lemon juice and parmesan cheese, cover and set aside.

Then make the gnocchi: drain the potatoes well and shake over the heat to dry them thoroughly.  Mash the potatoes very finely, so that there are no lumps.  Beat in the flour, egg, salt, pepper and nutmeg.  Mix till it forms a dough and turn out on to a floured board.  With floured hands, roll small pieces of the dough into small croquettes, about the thickness of your thumb and cut them into bite size pieces.  Press lightly with the prongs of a fork creating four indentations, this will help them to hold the pesto sauce so you will have both the gnocchi and basil sauce in every bite.  Bring some salted water to a boil in a large pan.  Drop the gnocchi, a few at a time, into the boiling water and cook for 3 – 5 minutes.  The gnocchi will rise to the surface and float when they are cooked.  Remove and drain.  Arrange the gnocchi in a buttered serving dish and dot with butter.  Sprinkle with parmesan cheese and pour the basil pesto sauce over the top.







Sarah Afshar’s Exclusive Interview with Morgan’s brother Ryan


Ryan.Morgan.1999Morgan’s older sister and brother both adored her.  She was their baby sister.  She was 13 years younger than her sister, and 10 years younger than her brother, and she would have been 23 years old this past August 16th.  Her brother Ryan wanted to be able to speak out about what happened to his sister, he wanted to share his inner most feelings about the pain in his heart that he has had ever since Morgan was taken from this world.  There are people “others” on the Internet that want to attack victims and co-victims, and Morgan’s brother has also been attacked.  Up until now he has not come out and said anything, and these “others” have spent a lot of time making up whatever they want as if it came out of his mouth.

It’s very, very sad that people do this kind of thing.  I recently heard that an old friend of mine lost her boyfriend to a heart attack, and even she was attacked on the Internet by people saying very cruel things to her.  She was a person that lost a loved one to natural causes.  Yet they said things like, “He was never your boyfriend” along with really nasty lies…why?  Why do some people have the need to attack others that are grieving for absolutely no reason?  Have they lost their humanity or are they just a product of a very sad reality of their own?  Just like in the most recent tragedy of the loss of Robin Williams.  It has been reported all over the news that “others” attacked his daughter so viciously on social media that she took down all of her sights.  How could people be this cruel?  And the next question I have is why would good logical people ever begin to believe the lies and filth these people try to float?  Why would they even want to read any of the things these people write about?  And my last question on that subject is if any of the “others” really were knowledgable and were ever coming from truth then why are they always anonymous?  Why do they always use fake names, and fake accounts?

I have had people tell me that the “others” on the Internet have said stuff about Steve and I – they said we took out a life insurance policy on Morgan so we don’t want people to know she killed herself.  We never had a life insurance policy taken out on Morgan, or any of our children – why would we?  Our children are supposed to outlive us as parents.  If the mere thought of someone thinking this wasn’t so sick it would almost be laughable, but it’s not, it’s disgusting.  What kind of people think that way?  I wish the others would get a clue – Morgan never committed suicide – Morgan was murdered and there is still a murderer out there. There is ample proof that she was murder in a horrific way and If you knew your daughter had been murdered, if you had seen and heard the evidence that proves she was murdered would you just sit back and let her murder be swept under the rug?  Would you just allow false allegations to be tossed around without trying to bring the truth to light? I don’t think so.  Yes, it’s painful, but it is a reality and something we have to do, and there is no getting around that fact.

The loss of his sister has been extremely hard on Ryan.  He was so filled with anger for the first 2 years he couldn’t talk about it, but now he wants justice and has faith that Steve and I will be able to keep pushing forward until Morgan’s case gets opened, and those responsible for her murder are arrested.  He always gives me a little nudge over the phone at least once a week, “keep going Mom, what are you waiting for, hurry up.”

Morgan wrote this to her brother Ryan:

January 06, 2009
To the best brother a girl could ask for, when people tell me that the world is a cruel and horrible place all I can do is smile. I smile because I know them to be wrong. I know that the world is a beautiful place worth fighting for. I know this because of you. When I think of you I feel my heart, not the one that beats, rather the one that feels. Seventeen years here on earth, I have seen bad people and good people, but you Ryan, I know to be the best. For reasons I can ‘t quite explain, I see you more clearly than other people. I see your struggles and your triumphs, but mostly I see your heart. I am truly blessed to have a person like you in my life, a person who makes hope look so tangible, so real. ~Morgan

Please click on this link to read Ryan’s interview.  Thank you Sarah Afshar for giving Ryan a chance to use his voice.



Getting Away With #Murder in Colorado – maybe not for long

FOHVAMPCREST  I would like everyone to know that there is hope out there. For example FOHVAMP, a non profit out of Denver, CO has made a huge difference in the fight for justice for many families over the years

Getting Away With Murder in Colorado

Colorado has a backlog of 1,600 unsolved murders dating back to 1970. The killers of these victims have never been prosecuted for these murders. They walk among us. They live in our neighborhoods. These murderers, who have escaped justice, pose a serious threat to the safety of every Colorado citizen.

Murder is a crime against the state. FOHVAMP maintains that when a case cannot be solved by local law enforcement in a reasonable period of time, the state has an obligation to step in.

For the past five years FOHVAMP has advocated a state-level cold case team to help investigate these unsolved homicides. The state bureaucracy has been unresponsive. In 2007, the legislature created a cold case team at Colorado Bureau of Investigation (CBI) with only enough funding for a single analyst to collect data from law enforcement agencies.

FOHVAMP and the CBI make periodic comparisons to insure the accuracy of that data.

Families of Homicide Victims and Missing Persons Executive Director Rob Wells, President Mark Reichert, Vice President Tina Terry, and board member Diane Riechert recently spoke at The National Press Club in Washington D.C. to express the need for a National Cold Case Database. To their knowledge, FOHVAMP’s Colorado Cold Case Database is the first cold case database in the nation to have been compiled. Since 1970, in Colorado, there have been approximately 1,600 unsolved murders, which is 38% of all of Colorado’s murders during this time period. The number is lower than the national average, which the FBI estimates to be 42%.  And still 1,600 unsolved murders in Colorado is 1,600 too many.

The FOHVAMP members visiting Washington met with Florida Victim’s Advocate Ryan Backmann, of Compassionate Families, Inc. Ryan’s father was murdered in a robbery. His father’s murder is unsolved. Ryan is in the process of putting together a Florida Cold Case Database. With only one-third of the Florida jurisdictions reporting, there are 4,400 unsolved murders. Jacksonville alone has 1,400, nearly the amount for the entire state of Colorado.

FOHVAMP will keep you posted on the progress of The National Cold Case Database through their website and on their Facebook page

Families of Homicide Victims and Missing Persons, Inc. (FOHVAMP) is a nonprofit organization working in Colorado to find, support and empower families suffering from a loved one’s unresolved murder or long-time suspicious disappearance. They provide peer support, assistance with victim compensation, referrals and coordination with other organizations for services and assistance. They serve as a liaison with law enforcement agencies, provide criminal justice support and advocacy. They work with Universities on special studies, many of which have been published. They seek out victim’s families (co-victims) to assist. Every October, they host an Annual Meeting with guest speakers to bring together victim’s families and law enforcement.

This year‘s Annual Meeting is going to be held at the Brittany Hill Event Center in Thornton, Colorado on October 4th, 2014. Please go to their website to register for this event.  The price to attend is only $45 per person.  I would suggest getting your tickets now before they sell out.  The purpose of this meeting is to bring co-victims into a neutral area where they will be able to brush up on their knowledge of the current techniques being used in the investigation process as well as meeting with their detectives on a neutral platform. Their hope is that the Annual Meeting will be able to educate their co-victims and promote the proper tools and coping mechanisms to assist them in their daily lives, as well as with the progress in their cases. Often, it is only at this meeting that the co-victims have the opportunity to touch base with their Detectives annually. Through the Colorado Cold Case Task Force, FOHVAMP is trying to assist in making it a mandate that all coroners in the state need to attend a base line training and certification on how to successfully deal with a cold case as well as the basics of their role in that position. The hope is that this would need to be completed within one year of the coroner taking office.

Here’s FOHVAMP’s registration form for the Saturday October 4 annual conference at the Brittany Hill events center, Thornton, CO.
More info to follow, but speakers will include Silvia Pettem, Jerry Brown, Paul Meshanko, Kathy Sasak, and Ron Sloan
 — at Brittany Hill.

If you know anyone that has had an unresolved homicide in their family or have a missing loved one please refer them to FOHVAMP – they will listen, and they do help…please take my word on this, I know because they have helped us with Morgan’s homicide.

If you can help connect them with a family of a victim of an unresolved homicide or long-time missing person that has a Colorado connection, please call Rob Wells at 202-497-4580, Kelly Fernandez-Kroyer at 720-937-8905, or send an email

These families need to know about FOHVAMP. They can help them.  They need and want your help. Their priority is to encourage law enforcement to effectively address old, unsolved murders.

Thanks so much!


Is there something very wrong in #Garfield County, or is it just me?

garfieldcountyLong ago, right after the blog of Morgan’s stalking was just getting going I was contacted by a local author writing a piece about the great disparity between suicides, and homicides in Garfield County.  What was shared with me was fascinating, and troubling all at the same time.  But back then we were being told by Garfield County that Morgan’s death was from natural causes, while at the same time Morgan’s doctor believed her death was a homicide, and another forensic pathologist was telling me she did not die from natural causes, it was a suspicious death and should have been listed at the very least as undetermined until a full investigation had been done.  Along with all of this I was being threatened by the contracted forensic pathologist for Garfield County.  He said that Morgan’s manner of death could be revisited, and could possibly be changed from natural causes to an accidental overdose or suicide if I didn’t back off…I believe the grief, shock and stress I was feeling at the time was paralyzing me in so many ways, and I heard what I was being told by all these different parties, but at the same time my mind couldn’t properly grasp it all.  Writing on this blog about the things that happened to Morgan during her stalking helped keep me going, but looking back on it now I only thought I was pushing hard, truth be told I was only a fraction of myself.  Oh the things you learn as you come out of your grief bubble…
 I  honestly do not think Morgan’s case is the only one like this in Garfield County.  I have talked to other families and friends of missing, and dead loved ones, and I hear the same run-around that we received given to others, along with all the same non answers that we got.  These other families speak of the same unanswered phone calls, emails and letters.  They speak of evidence that the Sheriffs department or Coroner’s office had that has now gone “missing” or was “accidentally destroyed”, I even received a call from a mom that had spent her whole retirement account hiring a ballistic expert, private investigator, etc. and had solid evidence that her son did not shoot himself, but was shot with a completely different gun then the gun the police took into evidence (the gun that had been collected from the scene had never been shot and it was a different caliber than the gun that shot the bullet into her son’s body), and they still would not open that case or change his manner of death from suicide.  
In an article written by John Colson for the Post Independent newspaper about Morgan’s manner of death being changed from natural causes to suicide (and yes, this was after I was threatened by the pathologist to back off in trying to facilitate other doctors, and experts into explaining to him how his first conclusion was incorrect, that Morgan did not die from natural causes, and yes again, the Sheriff and Coroner had been notified about the threats, but would never respond) on August 31, 2012 Garfield County Sheriff Lou Vallario is quoted as saying that he would stick by the contracted forensic pathologist Dr. Kurtzman’s conclusion of suicide.  Sheriff Vallario wrote in an email to the reporter, “The results of the autopsy and pathology reports were that the manner of death was suicide.”  The sheriffs knew that her death was considered a suspicious death because of her stalking (that is why an autopsy was done, that was why crime scene tape was put up all around our house and we were asked to leave the scene), but they decided on the exact morning her body was found that it had nothing to do with her stalking.  Then right after the Post Independent article came out, Jeff Todd a reporter for CBS in Denver filmed Sheriff Lou Vallario right in the front of the courthouse in Glenwood Springs, CO stating that he would never open Morgan’s case.  Never?  I thought if evidence is brought forward in a capital crime that there is no statue of limitations, and a case can be opened at any time?  Am I mistaken here, or was Morgan’s case, like so many other suspicious cases in Garfield County closed, shut down, and buried for some sinister reason?  I really need to know the answer to that question – I feel that I deserve an answer to that question, wouldn’t you?  Please look at the following report from Garfield County and tell me what you think.  Is it just me or does something look wrong with these numbers?
Maybe it is just me, but when I look at this stat sheet for Garfield County it suggests to me a story about a county that does not want any murders on its books…natural causes, accidental, or suicide those are all okay, along with run aways, but not foul play, murder, kidnapping, or rape…they don’t want any of those on their stats. As you can see on the Garfield County stats that listed results of Colorado Death Dataset Query for suicides, and homicides- I have circled the 5 years ending in 2011 (the year Morgan was murdered) it shows 53 deaths (due to suicide or homicide), 50 were determined to be suicide and the other 3 are not listed under homicide, so they are either not accounted for, or undetermined…in my opinion this is why Garfield County has been said to have one of the highest suicide rates in the country, but I don’t believe they are all suicides, I think they have listed other types of deaths like Morgan’s as suicides that were really not suicides.  Anything to not have a homicide on their stats.  This type of protocol only causes to re-victimize the already traumatized families.  Not only re-victimizing families, but allowing a murder to never be investigated would seem to me to be dangerous to others in the community, unless of course Garfield County feels confident that a murderer will never murder again.  How confident do you feel about that?
Does anyone know when this type of thing started?  When did Garfield County start to go down this slippery road?  Is there any turning back?  I have to hope they can turn this all around, and start to uphold the law, protect their citizens, make the truth their number one priority.  It may take the citizens of the county to join their voices in protest and show the elected officials what they expect, and in an election year such as this one, it seems like a good time to make your vote count.  Speak out – write in to the local newspaper (like the Aspen Times, or the Post Independent).  Take a stand, make your voice heard.  No one wants this to ever happen to their family, so please make sure it can never happen to another family in Garfield County, or anywhere else.  Change is needed and change will come – hopefully sooner rather than later.  Thank you so much – each and every one of you have the power to move mountains!

“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.” 


Morgan’s friend and soulmate speaks out…


As you all know our youngest daughter Morgan was stalked for 4 months while in college and living at home with her dad and I.  We lived through the stalking with her, so I know it was horrific. I was frightened the whole time for Morgan’s safety, as her stalker kept escalating no matter what deterrents we produced. The Garfield County Sheriffs had a suspect, and told me they were 100% sure this person was her stalker.  Morgan had identified him multiple times, our cameras caught pictures, they had interviewed him, and were planning on picking up his work hours to overlay them on my timeline of the stalking incidents, but she was murdered 4 days before that was to happen.

The morning I found our youngest daughter’s body I knew deep in my soul that she had been murdered.  My mind didn’t want to believe it, but the way her body looked, the position it was in, and the condition of her room, there was no denying to me that something had gone on involving a struggle and foul play.  Garfield County Detective Robert Glassmire told us that very morning that her death had “no connection” with her felony stalking case, and immediately “red flags” went up for me.  This was just 3 days after he told me to my face that he believed the stalking was going to “escalate.”  He could not have known at that time if her death had nothing to do with her stalking, I had been so trusting of the sheriff’s department (I have always respected law enforcement), and didn’t want to believe they weren’t on our side.  I was in shock at the time, but I “felt” something was terribly wrong, and now almost 3 years later with all the evidence and facts that we have accumulated (and tried to share with the sheriffs) the only question I have remaining is why has Morgan’s manner of death has never been changed to reflect the truth, and why is there no investigation into her murder?

Over the months, and years of pursuing the truth about our daughter’s death I now know for a fact that she was murdered, and she did not die a fast, or easy death – she was frightened, and tortured.  Morgan was gentle, loving and kind, she did not deserve to die like this. Families should be treated with dignity and respect, which we were not. Families need to know the truth, and not have their loved ones forgotten under a veil of threats and lies – this is outright re-victimization of the family.  Other victims of stalking need to see that law enforcement will take them seriously so they don’t end up dead like Morgan and then swept under the rug.

I live with the pain of the loss of my youngest daughter every day, and night. The pain is indescribable, and made worse by the fact that my husband and I have to relive her stalking, and murder every single day that we work on getting her case opened all by ourselves.  It is something no family should have to endure, but we had no choice because someone had to do an investigation, someone had to find the answers, and assemble the evidence, and law enforcement refused to do so.  When you love someone so deeply you can not just step aside and let their memory disappear into a morass of lies and untruths.

As my husband said, “The truth will always be vigorously disputed by some, the criminals and their accomplices. The erectors and maintainers of the great big blue wall behind which such truth now hides.  Her bravery and suffering must be respected at some point, her honor restored.  To date I have watched as lies pile upon lies and egos rule the day.  It is no wonder that murders go on within Colorado where such obvious lies can go on unabated, and it so deeply saddens my heart to have watched this happen.”

What I really want people to know besides my own feelings is that Morgan had many family members, as well as friends that loved her deeply and have been profoundly affected by her murder and non-investigation by the sheriffs.  All of these people have suffered and are still suffering and are co-victims in my opinion – they deserve answers.  Now that I have gotten that off my chest I would like to give you this link so you can read the interview that Joe Valo did with Rainer Jundt about Morgan.  Rainer is included in the ever growing list of co-victims – read for yourself just one person’s reality of how Morgan’s passing has affected him.